It's been far too long

The title of this entry eludes to a number of things. The first of which is it has been a very long time since I have posted anything here. Trying to make a difference in the world can be very time consuming. Not to mention the fact that I don't always feel that it's safe to post every one of my qualms about my career out in public. You just never know who might be reading this.

But I am going to try to add a few points of discussion this year. The first is RtI. This is also the other reference to the title. In my three years as a practicing school psychologist I have not had the luxury of working in a school that has an established RtI process (or MTSS as it is referred to in the state of Kansas). This can be quite frustrating because I know how beneficial it can be to both the students and the teachers. Yet the resistance to establishing such a process is strong. I have found that most teachers hate change. They want to keep doing the same thing they have been doing for years regardless of its lack of effectiveness. Now not all teachers are this way, but a good majority. At least in my short experience.

Last year I worked in one school that was starting the process. It was imperfect, but fabulous to see them embracing it! They were able to see how useful it can be to both helping the students and defining a clearer path to identification. I was very proud of them and eager to help.

The other school I work in went through the MTSS training (the leadership team did anyway), but nothing really changed. In fact, it seemed to become much more convoluted. It also seemed to just make the process essentially disappear. Inconsistency in identifying students at-risk properly became the norm. And now it seems we are standing on the fence between the old ways and the new ways, neither of which are being implemented effectively to make appropriate changes.

So one of my goals this year is to shake it up. I want to see this school be as good as I know it can be. This means that some people are going to have to change their way of doing things whether they like it or not. In order for me to get this to happen I need administrative support. I'm hoping I can get that. I won't be here at this school forever and I want to leave it knowing that they are on the right track to helping kids.

So here we go! A new school year! Let's get to it!

504 Plans: What's the point?

I have not had the experience of developing 504 Plans. Generally, this is not something that is drawn up by the school psychologist...or so I'm told. I have a general idea what they are and their purpose, but very little understanding of the 'process behind the document'. For IEPs there is a very extensive process, which is legally defined for us by state and federal law. We have guidelines for each step and explicit expectations to meet. Schools (well, most schools, there are definitely exceptions to this out there) don't have a problem with meeting the needs of students who are eligible for Special Education Supports. (Now, is this solely because IEPs are backed by government funding? I don't know. I'm certain that has a lot to do with it, but we'll get to that later.)

The school I work in now does an amazing job at providing supports for students in need. When I refer to students in need, I'm not just talking students with an IEP. I'm also talking about students in the tier two intervention process (ours intervention team is referred to as the Student Intervention Team (SIT), but everyone has their own special term for them.) These are teams that consist of several school staff professionals gathering to problem solve ways to help students who are struggling, but not struggling to a significant degree.

When considering my own education teams and the excellent support resources our school provides for all students I have to ask myself...what is the point of a 504 Plan?  I've asked this of some colleagues as well who work in school that actually do 504 plans. The typical answer is "They are mandated by law." But what good is a law if it's not enforced? I don't see anyone checking into schools to see why there are no 504 plans done. If fact even the "auditing" done through special education might be considered kind of a joke. I mean, all they do is check the paperwork (at least from what I've seen so far in my experience). So essentially schools can do as much or as little as they want for kids as long as the paperwork says all the right things, is up to date, has signatures, and parents aren't making a fuss about any of it. But I digress... Another reason I've heard is that some schools will use 504 plans to decrease their special education ratio. In some cases it does seem appropriate to do a 504 Plan. Let me give you a scenario. You have a student whose expense and liability is great due to the severity of their disability. Their disability doesn't impact their ability to learn or put them significantly behind their peers academically. However, their disability forces the need for ramps to be put in, a staff member trained to work with the medical conditions the student has to deal with on a daily basis such as toileting, and maybe the school has to put in new doors too. These necessary supports will likely be very costly. The student generally gets by throughout the day without the need for an intense amount of help. There are times when they may have some kind of emergency situation that needs tended to and they might need help with toileting. So the student has a disability, but they don't show a need for intensive support services beyond what be provided through general education. This would be one case where a 504 Plan might be more appropriate. Another situation would be if you have a student with a vision or hearing disability, but the disability itself does not significantly impact their ability to learn. Or perhaps you have a student with a vision disorder that makes some activities difficult to do such as transfer information from the board to paper or see things on a computer screen. Academically they do fine and with a little bit of intervention could probably do a little better. The parents are also wanting a document such as an IEP or 504 Plan that can follow them after high school. Seems reasonable since the disability is one the child will have to deal with for the rest of their life. Technically, both of these situations warrant 504 Plans, but when the school psych mentions that dirty dirty word administrators about have a stroke.

There are good reasons for administration to be fearful of 504 Plans though. Now that I've done the research I completely understand why it freaks them out! It's not just that there's no federally funded monies that the school can access to support them (i.e. purchasing specialized curriculum/supplies, etc, which contrasts from special education since the school is allotted financial aid to help fund supplies needed for identified students). I used to think this was the only reason. I wasn't entirely wrong, but there's much more to it than I realized before. 504 plans can also be super scary because if your school were to be audited by the government to check on the fidelity and implementation of your plans and they had not been updated (similar to an IEP), and/or were not being followed to the extent of the plan that was devised, the government can essentially remove ALL of your school's funding (i.e. any state aided funds for ANY/ALL programs that are being supported within your school system...not just special education funds)! This would be a HUGE loss to the school system and community! Parental litigation is also a concern – it's not like IEPs/MDTs aren't prone to legal litigation – it's the concern that if the parent has a legitimate argument and the school is found "guilty" of not providing the identified services, the school is vulnerable to more "loss" than the average special education legal case. This makes principals and superintendents uncomfortable (to say the least) and rightly so!

So, what's the right thing to do? Personally, I feel that we should do whatever we can that is in the best interest of the child. Then again when the government gets involved it can get quite sticky. So, I'm not sure I can say with any conviction (yet) what I think the right thing to do is. I'm still working on that. In the meantime, I hope to find minimal reasons to have 504 Plans drawn up. They seem great and may have been initially developed with good intentions, but seem to be more trouble than they're worth. If you have the staff to support them and ensure that they are followed through and managed then go for it, but if you don't you might just be asking for trouble.

Searching For Hope

Sometimes I find myself riddled with sadness and frustration. I hate feeling like I'm unable to help others in a meaningful and lasting way. So many of my students live in terrible homes with parents or guardians who neglect them or abuse them. Many of the students come to school in filthy clothes, clothes that don't fit or have holes in them, and without having been fed properly. Some of them come to school exhausted because their parents don't have a bed for them to sleep in so they sleep on the floor. I make a lot of calls to social services and they are mostly just a waste of time. They rarely do anything to help if they do anything at all.

How can we expect children to be ready to learn when their basic needs are not met? We can't. That's the truth of it. So what, as educators, can we do? I have yet to find an answer to this question.

I want to help these kids, give them clothes, care, food, and all the things that little children should be getting from their parents, but I just don't make enough money to support multiple children. I've been considering creating a charity drive for children in need that attend our school. It would be so nice to just go and grab whatever a student needs...clean clothes, clothes that fit, a book bag, school supplies, or whatever. I haven't really figured out how to do this yet or if it would even be appropriate for me to do so.

Experiences of the Unexperienced

Lately, I've been really frustrated. I've felt defeated and unheard. I've battled with myself on "ethics & morals" versus "what is right or wrong simply as it is defined by law." I'm realizing the extent of my naivety. I once thought that professionals actually had ethics, believed in them, and followed them like personal law. Ethics is stressed so much in our training programs. I just assumed that people really believed in doing what is right. I have found myself in many moments of a "reality check" related to this issue. The reality is that people like me are the minority. Granted, I've only been working in one place so far. So, I'm just hoping that it's not as bad in other places. I'm hoping that not all the world is corrupt and heartless.

Another realization I've come to lately is that people working in a helping profession feel helpless a lot more than I had anticipated. As our economy continues to implode and people continue to lose their jobs, the stress of it all trickles down to the children. Then those children go to school feeling angry, helpless, sad, and confused.  Some parents are at least helpful enough to make an effort in the home environment to help their children but most are not. It is a hard reality to face when we can only do as much as we can while we have these children a few hours a day, then they go home and we start all over again the following day. It takes a lot of courage and perseverance to keep on keeping on in this field of work. Sometimes at the end of the day, once I'm alone, I cry. It's all I can do to put on a happy face for these children. They need that more than anything. They need someone who will always be super excited to see them; give them high fives, hugs, and unconditional positive regard. But sometimes I have to pull them out of a dark place or calm them from a rage. This is both physically and emotionally exhausting and it's all I can do to not break down crying in front of them. It hurts me to see such little children be in so much emotional turmoil. It's just not right, they shouldn't have to deal with the things they have to deal with. But I keep doing what I do because the little successes are so powerful. I keep doing it because I could never be content sitting idly by watching people suffer. I have to do something even if all it is is making a someone smile.

I love my job, don't get me wrong. I absolutely wouldn't want to do anything else. But there are a lot more challenges to this than I thought. I'm learning every single day. I love that too, but sometimes it's a hard lesson I have to learn. 

I've also decided that I will start closing each blog with a profound quote. Words of others often provide me with comfort and inspiration. By sharing them I hope someone else finds inspiration and comfort as well. 

“Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

At the End of Each Day I Leave With a Sigh and a Hope In My Heart That I Did My Very Best

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and to endure the betrayal of false friends. To appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

I find myself returning to this quote for comfort time and time again. It reminds me that I need to take a minute to realize that I am doing the best that I can and the best that I can is good enough...right?

This year has already been very draining and it's barely even got started. I am working more closely with the ED/BD self-contained classroom and we just got a new student in there a week or so ago. It's been hard. He has been diagnosed with juvenile bi-polar disorder. I've never really worked with anyone who is like him. He's such a wonderful and imaginative little guy, but can switch into a fit of rage and fury in an instant. I don't even have to be in the classroom all day and it drains me. It's not really physically draining, although at times it can be, but more emotionally draining because I know these kids all have troubles and trauma. I want to do so much to help them, but sometimes I feel like there's really nothing I can do or I just can't do enough.


Sometimes this job can be so taxing, but I still love it.

Something to Think About

I have this situation with a student. He's been in many schools and has been a continuous behavior problem. He's on an IEP for SLD. Now he's 18. He comes to school, yet he does not have to. He says he wants to graduate, yet refuses to do any work. What gives?

I feel I am missing something very important here. I just can't put my finger on it. 

I Need All The Answers and All The Magic Cures

On the outside I may look like I've got it all figured out. It just must be the case because lately people have been bombarding me with questions. I feel like I need all the answers or I'm not doing my job well. It's a lot of pressure. I wish I did have all the answers. I want to be able to help so many people at once. Then I run into the other issue of time. There's just never enough of it.